Didn't see this one coming...

I don't know where to begin. This entire blog thing has really thrown me. Our assignment is to blog at least three times a week, a fairly easy assign (or so I had thought) considering all the amazing experiences we are having here. After being here for three days and watching everyone around me blogging 24-7, I haven't been able to write a damn thing, until now obviously. I feel like everyone around me is having a life changing experience while I'm left feeling somewhat numb. I came into this May term promising myself that I'd approach it with an open mind, to separate my time in Kenya from my experience here in Capetown. Now, after being here, I realize that that is impossible. In so many ways I used to be able to compartmentalize my life: school was separate from friends, friends separate from boyfriends, boyfriends separate from family, family separate from my personal struggles and dreams. Yet now, since I've left Kenya, all aspects of my life have meshed into one. I no longer can think of one without thinking about the other. And that has become so overwhelming in itself. I'm juggling all of these thoughts and emotions from all of these other aspects in my life that I am having a hard time focusing solely on this experience. However...I'm suppose to blog about this experience...
I've tried to sit down and write, and no words have come to me. As a result, I have decided that my blogs will consist of totally random thoughts, some related to my time here in Capetown, and some totally irrelevant. With that being said, I apologize if I'm babbling and not making any sense.
What made me come to this conclusion? Recently was the two year anniversary of the death of the death of Mike Williams, a recent high school graduate that lived with my family for about a year when he committed suicide. His anniversary is a constant reminder of what I've learned from that experience: to cut to the core of people, find out who they truly are, their struggles, insecurities, and fears. Since Mike's death, I have made that of goal of mine. To truly get to know the people around me. To get past the surface relationships and to take interest in finding the true individual. It is now, here in Capetown, that I have realized how hypocritical I have been...I have not let others into my life. Here I've been, trying and sometimes expecting other to "get real" with me, yet I am the one that is holding back. So now, after being assigned to blog, I have decided to let people in to who I am. By being completely open, vulnerable, and honest with the people around me, I will grow.