Leaving to Live

...So I'm heading off to my home stay. Coleton and I are staying together with a single woman and I couldn't me more excited about it. I've been waiting for the time here in South Africa to be able to sit down and get to know a native person. Our host mother's name Laziwe, but we secretly refer to her as big mama. She is hysterical! We've already met her and within five minutes of knowing her she was telling us how much she hates cooking and will not make any food for us...instead she said she'll be sending us off to other people's home to eat...I'm in love with her already. There are also only 2 beds, so she said that Cole and I will be taking turns sleeping with her. Usually, I'd think this might be a little awkward. However, in this circumstance, I think it will bring us closer together...literally : ). I can't wait to chill with big mama!
The next three days we'll be in the townships doing service projects and experiencing the lives of the majority of the population. I was surprised however when we drove through Guguletu yesterday. The road that we drove on is supposedly one of the main roads leading to the 2010 World Cup stadium. As a result, the road has been drastically changed. Apparently old, small, tin homes where broken down to make room for the city to line the street with trees. The road was also redone in an extremely nice way to help clean up the township. Honestly, when I drove through it yesterday, part of me thought, "Wow, this looks pretty nice considering it's a slum." This thought disturbs me. Part of me thinks that maybe I've spend a long enough time in Kenya experiencing the slums that I'm becoming somewhat numb to it now...God, I hope that is not true. Another part of me got really angry. I feel like by redoing the township, the World Cup people are trying to mask the realities of life here in South Africa. To make everything appear to the outside world things here in South Africa aren't really that bad and that it should stop being viewed as a Third World country. I hope in the next three days I get to know the real Guguletu.

Didn't see this one coming...

I don't know where to begin. This entire blog thing has really thrown me. Our assignment is to blog at least three times a week, a fairly easy assign (or so I had thought) considering all the amazing experiences we are having here. After being here for three days and watching everyone around me blogging 24-7, I haven't been able to write a damn thing, until now obviously. I feel like everyone around me is having a life changing experience while I'm left feeling somewhat numb. I came into this May term promising myself that I'd approach it with an open mind, to separate my time in Kenya from my experience here in Capetown. Now, after being here, I realize that that is impossible. In so many ways I used to be able to compartmentalize my life: school was separate from friends, friends separate from boyfriends, boyfriends separate from family, family separate from my personal struggles and dreams. Yet now, since I've left Kenya, all aspects of my life have meshed into one. I no longer can think of one without thinking about the other. And that has become so overwhelming in itself. I'm juggling all of these thoughts and emotions from all of these other aspects in my life that I am having a hard time focusing solely on this experience. However...I'm suppose to blog about this experience...
I've tried to sit down and write, and no words have come to me. As a result, I have decided that my blogs will consist of totally random thoughts, some related to my time here in Capetown, and some totally irrelevant. With that being said, I apologize if I'm babbling and not making any sense.
What made me come to this conclusion? Recently was the two year anniversary of the death of the death of Mike Williams, a recent high school graduate that lived with my family for about a year when he committed suicide. His anniversary is a constant reminder of what I've learned from that experience: to cut to the core of people, find out who they truly are, their struggles, insecurities, and fears. Since Mike's death, I have made that of goal of mine. To truly get to know the people around me. To get past the surface relationships and to take interest in finding the true individual. It is now, here in Capetown, that I have realized how hypocritical I have been...I have not let others into my life. Here I've been, trying and sometimes expecting other to "get real" with me, yet I am the one that is holding back. So now, after being assigned to blog, I have decided to let people in to who I am. By being completely open, vulnerable, and honest with the people around me, I will grow.

"I've been sitting, waiting wishing...." Pre-arrival reflection

...So here I sit, waiting to board my final flight that will bring me to my long awaited adventures in Capetown. I'm back in Africa and could not be more excited. After studying abroad in Kenya and then leaving for short while to travel around the South Pacific, I have had a little bit of time to reflect on my experiences in Africa and learn to appreciate the culture (despite the frustrations and daily inconveniences that were so prevalent). I feel so lucky to have the unique opportunity to experience two African countries and cultures in the same year. And to be honest, I am a bit overwhelmed and nervous. After spending so much time in Kenya, I'm afraid that I'm going to approach my time here in South Africa in a more judgmental manner with a lot of preconceived notions. I truly hope that I will be able to have an open mind about what I experience in Capetown and not over compare my time here with my previous experiences. South Africa is a new place, a new culture, and a new experience. If I come in to this opportunity with the right mindset, I believe this experience will challenge me and expand my perception of the world...Let the adventures begin!!!